Thursday, December 31, 2009

An Email



Oh Allah

Oh Allah, I have no money, but I have You. I am rich.
Oh Allah, I have no freedom, but I believe in you. I am free.
Oh Allah, I have no patience, but I read Your Quran. I am calm.
Oh Allah, I get no respect, but You listen to my dua’a. I am proud.
Oh Allah, I have no time, but I think of Jannah (Heaven.) I have forever.
Oh Allah, I have much time, but I look at Your Signs. I have today.
Oh Allah, I feel so weak, but I fast Ramadan. I am strong.
Oh Allah, I feel so tired, but I make dua’a. I open my eyes.
Oh Allah, I feel so dirty, but I repent to You. I am cleansed.
Oh Allah, I feel so depressed, but I remember you. I am at peace.
Oh Allah, I feel so lost, but I follow Your Commands. I am safe.
Oh Allah, nobody listens, but You never turn your back on me. I am grateful.
Oh Allah, my heart breaks, but I imagine meeting You. My heart finds rest.
Oh Allah, I cry every night, but I make wudu. I wash away my tears.
Oh Allah, I feel so alone, but I pray to You. I have everything.
Oh Allah, I feel so dead, but I think about Hajj. My heart beats again.
Oh Allah, I don't want this life, and I will die for You, only to live forever.

All I have is Allah,
All I need is Allah

Monday, December 28, 2009

Family: Part IV and V


Uncle C. and Aunt E. are married. They live on a small farm outside of town and have a bunch of goats, chickens, ducks, geese, etc.

My uncle is retired from his work as an electrical repair dude and my Aunt E. works as a secretary I think at one of the doctor’s offices in town.

Aunt E. is a very quiet person and she made no comment on the way I dressed. I could tell she was surprised but didn’t feel as if it was her place to comment on the way that I dress.

Uncle C. didn’t recognize me, lol. When I turned around and gave him a big hug he was really surprised and then was like “oh I didn’t see you… I mean I didn’t know it was you… I mean I didn’t know you were coming” haha. Good save Uncle C… :-P

Neither of them made a big deal about the way I was dressed and treated me pretty much as usual.


Uncle H. and Aunt S. are also married. Uncle H. is my dad’s brother and Aunt S. is his second wife.

She didn’t say I word to me. I’m not even sure if she said hello, but I’m pretty sure that is how she usually treats me so no worries.

Uncle H. gave me a huge hug as per usual. I should also note that Uncle H. is the one that is most like my grandfather (who we called Papa) meaning he is the most awkward and most likely to say anything that comes to the top of his head, God bless him.

He said “NeverEver… how are you dressed??” I was going to answer, but of course he kept talking. “I don’t know what to call it… I don’t want to say it is Islamic… but what would you call it?” Of course he had to just awkwardly blurt that right out there, lol.

I looked up at him and said “Well Uncle H., I guess you could call it conservative.”

He said, “Conservative what?”

I said, “Conservative NeverEver.” Lol

That seemed to satisfy him, so then he asked me if it was because I knew some Amish people, HAHAHA. I told him that I did have a friend who was a Mennonite. He nodded his head and dropped the subject.

My family is so funny… LOL

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Family: Part III




Today's installment will be concerning my dad's mother. I call her Grandma and she is in her mid-eighties mashaAllah. She doesn't see very well, but she is still mashaAllah a very sharp lady. I love her to distraction. :-D

Her story goes over two days, so I will try to differentiate the conversations.

Day One: Yesterday

When I first came inside she just hugged me and told me how much she loved me and how glad she was that I was there. It had been a long time since I had been to see her, astaghfirullah.

Later in the day she looked at me and said "Well aren't you going to take off your coat and hat?" lol I told her no, I was very comfortable thank you, and that was that.

She didn't say anything about it for the rest of the day, probably due to the fact that she couldn't really see me so well.

Day Two: Today

Today, a few hours after I got to my grandmother's house, she looked at me again and said "NeverEver, can you explain to me your costume?" LOL!!! I could tell she was trying to be polite and just didn't know what to call the way I was dressing. I asked "My costume?!?" and laughed a little.

She said to me "Yes, I can tell it is something special, but I don't know why you wear it." MashaAllah I told you she was a sharp lady.

I wore a much brighter scarf today :-) It is plaid and made of the colors in the backgroud.

I told her that this is the way that I always dress, and how I am most comfortable dressing. I also told her that this was my way of telling the world that I respect myself and I expect them to do the same.

I assumed she had the same idea of those Bible verses as my Aunt, so I figured I would wait until I had my Bible and interpretation with me to approach the spiritual aspect of the way I dress. However, I believe that my social reasons for dressing as I do are very valid as well and she seemed to understand.

She nodded her head and once again that was that.

InshaAllah another update later!

Family: Itro and Part I



I'm writing this post from a very small town in Arkansas where my extended family from my dad's side resides.

Today was the first day that this side of my family saw me in hijab and I wanted to let you all know how it went. InshaAllah this will take up a few posts, so I will just do a little at a time.


First I should say ALHAMDULILLAH nothing really bad happened. There were a few weird questions and looks, but otherwise everyone was no more awkward than we normally are, lol.

The purpose of this visit was Christmas, as you all know that my family is Christian through and through. My goal was to introduce my family to the changes in my life without spilling the beans that I'm Muslim, as my dad still doesn't know and I'm not so sure that my extended family wouldn't try to cut all ties with me if they found out.


Two of the first people I saw on entering the house were my Aunt K. and my Cousin S. They each gave me a hug and we exchanged normal pleasantries... "It's so good go see you", "Its been too long", "How has life been going" etc. My Aunt immediately asked me why I was dressed the way I was.

I guess I should explain how I was dressed for the occasion, lol. I was wearing a white strapless dress with a denim jacket and a dusky blue patterned scarf with my ugg boots. Come on you guys... there was snow on the ground... my toes were coooold.

I explained to her (Aunt K.) that in the New Testament it says that women should cover their heads specifically in prayer, but it also says that we should always be praying, so I feel justified in covering my head all of the time. She seemed a bit taken aback by the way that I dressed and she also thought I was mistaken on the meaning of these verses, so I told her that I would (inshaAllah) send her the verse numbers as well as common interpretations.

After this quick conversation with my aunt, I sat down on the couch with my mom and my Cousin S. My cousin looked at me and just said "you look beautiful." *blush* mashaAllah and Alhamdulillah it was a really nice thing for my cousin to say and I'm glad to know I have her acceptance, at least of the way I dress. Cousin S. talked to my mom a little bit more after that about why I wear it. My mom said that she witnessed with her own eyes the way men treated me in public and how much more respectful they are now, alhamdulillah. It was really great to my have my mommy there as usual :-D!!

That is all for now...
InshaAllah I will do some more posts about this soon!!!

*oooo the suspense!!!*

Saturday, December 26, 2009




I received an e-mail about practices of Ashura and I decided to look up some information about it to come to my own conclusion.
For Ashura inshaAllah I will fast either the 9th and 10th or the 10th and 11th, but I will not be mourning for anyone. My reasoning can be found below. Also, inshaAllah I will post the e-mail as well.

love you girls!


Sahih Muslim
Book 006, Number 2524:

Ibn Abbas was asked about observing of fast on the day of Ashura, whereupon he said: I do not know Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) singling out any day's fast and considering it more excellent than another, except this day (the day of Ashura) and this month, meaning the month of Ramadan.

Sahih Muslim Book 006, Number 2520:

Ibn'Abbas (Allah be pleased with both of them) reported that the Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) arrived in Medina and found the Jews observing fast on the day of 'Ashura. The Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) said to them: What is the (significance) of this day that you observe fast on it? They said: It is the day of great (significance) when Allah delivered Moses and his people, and drowned the Pharaoh and his people, and Moses observed fast out of gratitude and we also observe it. Upon this the Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) said: We have more right, and we have a closer connection with Moses than you have; so Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) observed fast (on the day of 'Ashura), and gave orders that it should be observed.

Sahih Al-Bukhari Volume 4, Book 52, Number 93:

Narrated Abu Said:

I heard the Prophet saying, "Indeed, anyone who fasts for one day for Allah's Pleasure, Allah will keep his face away from the (Hell) fire for (a distance covered by a journey of) seventy years."


003:169 Do not think that those who are killed in the cause of GOD are dead; they are alive at their Lord, enjoying His provisions.

003:170 They are rejoicing in GOD's grace, and they have good news for their comrades who did not die with them, that they have nothing to fear, nor will they grieve.

Why should I grieve for someone who is rejoicing at being given provision by Allah subhana wa ta'ala?

Sahih Al-Bukhari Volume 4, Book 52, Number 72:

Narrated Anas bin Malik:

The Prophet said, "Nobody who enters Paradise likes to go back to the world even if he got everything on the earth, except a Mujahid who wishes to return to the world so that he may be martyred ten times because of the dignity he receives (from Allah)."

Narrated Al-Mughira bin Shu'ba: Our Prophet told us about the message of our Lord that "Whoever amongst us is killed will go to Paradise." Umar asked the Prophet, "Is it not true that our men who are killed will go to Paradise and their's (i.e. those of the Pagan's) will go to the (Hell) fire?" The Prophet said, "Yes."

Volume 2, Book 23, Number 382:

Narrated 'Abdullah:

the Prophet said, "He who slaps his cheeks, tears his clothes and follows the ways and Traditions of the Days of Ignorance is not one of us."

Volume 2, Book 23, Number 391:

Narrated 'Abdullah bin 'Umar :

Sad bin 'Ubada became sick and the Prophet along with 'Abdur Rahman bin 'Auf, Sad bin Abi Waqqas and 'Abdullah bin Masud visited him to enquire about his health. When he came to him, he found him surrounded by his household and he asked, "Has he died?" They said, "No, O Allah's Apostle." The Prophet wept and when the people saw the weeping of Allah's Apostle (p.b.u.h) they all wept. He said, "Will you listen? Allah does not punish for shedding tears, nor for the grief of the heart but he punishes or bestows His Mercy because of this." He pointed to his tongue and added, "The deceased is punished for the wailing of his relatives over him." 'Umar used to beat with a stick and throw stones and put dust over the faces (of those who used to wail over the dead).

Volume 2, Book 23, Number 392:

Narrated Aisha:

When the news of the martyrdom of Zaid bin Haritha, Ja'far and 'Abdullah bin Rawaha came, the Prophet sat down looking sad, and I was looking through the chink of the door. A man came and said, "O Allah's Apostle! The women of Ja'far," and then he mentioned their crying . The Prophet (p.b.u.h) ordered h im to stop them from crying. The man went and came back and said, "I tried to stop them but they disobeyed." The Prophet (p.b.u.h) ordered him for the second time to forbid them. He went again and came back and said, "They did not listen to me, (or "us": the sub-narrator Muhammad bin Haushab is in doubt as to which is right). " ('Aisha added: The Prophet said, "Put dust in their mouths." I said (to that man), "May Allah stick your nose in the dust (i.e. humiliate you)." By Allah, you could not (stop the women from crying) to fulfill the order, besides you did not relieve Allah's Apostle from fatigue."

Volume 2, Book 23, Number 425:

Narrated 'Aisha:

When the Prophet became ill, some of his wives talked about a church which they had seen in Ethiopia and it was called Mariya. Um Salma and Um Habiba had been to Ethiopia, and both of them narrated its (the Church's) beauty and the pictures it contained. The Prophet raised his head and said, "Those are the people who, whenever a pious man dies amongst them, make a place of worship at his grave and then they make those pictures in it. Those are the worst creatures in the Sight of Allah."

Ashura E-mail



Here is that e-mail that I received. If anyone knows any information pertaining to the subject that they would like to add, please do!!

> By Mufti Taqi Usmani
> Muharram is the month with which the Muslims begin their lunar Hijrah
> Calendar. It is one of the four sanctified months about which the Holy Quran
> says, "The number of the months according to Allah is twelve (mentioned) in
> the Book of Allah on the day He created heavens and the earth. Among these
> (twelve months) there are four sanctified."
> These four months, according to the authentic traditions, are Dhul-Qa'dah,
> Dhul-Hijjah, Muharram and Rajab. All the commentators of the Holy Quran are
> unanimous on this point, because the Holy Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa
> sallam, in his sermon on the occasion of his last Hajj, declared: "One year
> consists of twelve months, of which four are sanctified months, three of
> them are in sequence; Dhul-Qa'dah, Dhul-Hijjah, Muharram, and the fourth is
> Rajab."
> The specific mention of these four months does not mean that any other month
> has no sanctity, because the month of Ramadan is admittedly the most
> sanctified month in the year. But these four months were specifically termed
> as sanctified months for the simple reason that their sanctity was accepted
> even by the pagans of Makkah.
> In fact, every month, out of the twelve, is originally equal to the other,
> and there is no inherent sanctity that may be attributed to one of them in
> comparison to the other months. When Allah Almighty chooses a particular
> time for His special blessings, the same acquires sanctity out of His grace.
> Thus, the sanctity of these four months was recognized right from the days
> of Sayyidina Ibrahim, alayhi salam. Since the Pagans of Makkah attributed
> themselves to Sayyidina Ibrahim, alayhi salam, they observed the sanctity of
> these four months and despite their frequent tribal battles, they held it
> unlawful to fight in these months.
> In the Shariah of our Noble Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, the
> sanctity of these months was upheld and the Holy Quran referred to them as
> the "sanctified months".
> Muharram has certain other characteristics special to it, which are
> specified below.
> Fasting During the Month
> The Noble Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, has said: 'The best fasts
> after the fasts of Ramadan are those of the month of Muharram."
> Although the fasts of the month of Muharram are not obligatory, yet one who
> fasts in these days out of his own will is entitled to a great reward by
> Allah Almighty. The Hadith cited above signifies that the fasts of the month
> of Muharram are most rewardable ones among the Nafl or voluntary fasts.
> The Hadith does not mean that the award promised for fasts of Muharram can
> be achieved only by fasting for the whole month. On the contrary, each fast
> during this month has merit. Therefore, one should avail of this opportunity
> as much as he can.
> Back to Top
> The Day of 'Ashurah'
> Although Muharram is a sanctified month as a whole, yet, the 10th day of
> Muharram is the most sacred among all its days. The day is named 'Ashurah'.
> According to the Holy Companion Ibn 'Abbas, Radi-Allahu anhu. The Holy
> Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, when migrated to Madinah, found that
> the Jews of Madinah used to fast on the 10th day of Muharram. They said that
> it was the day on which the Holy Prophet Musa (Moses), alayhis salam, and
> his followers crossed the Red Sea miraculously and the Pharaoh was drowned
> in its waters. On hearing this from the Jews, the Holy Prophet, Sall-Allahu
> alayhi wa sallam, said, "We are more closely rotated to Musa, alayhi salam,
> than you," and directed the Muslims to fast on the day of 'Ashura'. (Abu
> Dawood)
> It is also reported in a number of authentic traditions that in the
> beginning, fasting on the day of 'Ashura' was obligatory for the Muslims. It
> was later that the fasts of Ramadan were made obligatory and the fast on the
> day of 'Ashura' was made optional. Sayyidina 'Aisha, Radi-Allahu anha, has
> said:
> "When the Holy Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, came to Madinah, he
> fasted on the day of 'Ashura' and directed the people to fast. But when the
> fasts of Ramadan were made obligatory, the obligation of fasting was
> confined to Ramadan and the obligatory nature of the fast of 'Ashura' was
> abandoned. Whoever so desires should fast on it and any other who so likes
> can avoid fasting on it." (Sunan Abu Dawud)
> However, the Holy Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, used to fast on the
> day of 'Ashura' even after the fasting in Ramadan was made obligatory.
> Abdullah ibn Musa, Radi-Allahu anhu, reports that the Holy Prophet,
> Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, preferred the fast of 'Ashura' on the fasts of
> other days and preferred the fasts of Ramadhaan on the fast of 'Ashura'.
> (Bukhari and Muslim)
> In short, it is established through a number of authentic ahadith that
> fasting on the day of 'Ashura' is Sunnah of the Holy Prophet, Sall-Allahu
> alayhi wa sallam, and makes one entitled to a great reward.
> According to another Hadith, it is more advisable that the fast of 'Ashura'
> should either be preceded or followed by another fast. It means that one
> should fast two days: the 9th and 10th of Muharram or the 10th and 11th. The
> reason of this additional fast as mentioned by the Holy Prophet, Sall-Allahu
> alayhi wa sallam, is that the Jews used to fast on the day of'Ashura alone,
> and the Holy Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, wanted to distinguish
> the Muslim way of fasting from that of Jews. Therefore, he advised the
> Muslims to add another fast to that of 'Ashura'.
> Some traditions signify another feature of the day of 'Ashura. According to
> these traditions, one should be more generous to his family by providing
> more food to them on this day as compared to other days. These traditions
> are not very authentic according to the science of Hadith. Yet, some
> Scholars like Baihaqi and Ibn Hibban have accepted them as reliable.
> What is mentioned above is all that is supported through authentic sources
> about Ashura.
> Back to Top
> Misconceptions and Baseless Traditions
> However, there are some legends and misconceptions with regard to 'Ashura'
> that have managed to find their way into the minds of the ignorant, but have
> no support of authentic Islamic sources, some very common of them are these:
> This is the day on which Adam, alayhi salam, was created. This is the day
> when Ibrahim, alayhi salam, was born. This is the day when Allah accepted
> the repentance of Sayyidina Adam, alayhi salam. This is the day when
> Qiyaamah (doomsday) will take place. Whoever takes bath on the day of
> 'Ashura' will never get ill.**
> All these and other similar whims and fancies are totally baseless and the
> traditions referred to in this respect are not worthy of any credit.
> Some people take it as Sunnah to prepare a particular type of meal on the
> day of 'Ashura'. This practice, too, has no basis in the authentic Islamic
> sources.
> Some other people attribute the sanctity of 'Ashura' to the martyrdom of
> Sayyidna Husain, Radi-Allahu anhu, during his battle with the Syrian army.
> No doubt, the martyrdom of Sayyidina Husain, Radi-Allahu anhu, is one of the
> most tragic episodes of our history. Yet, the sanctity of 'Ashura' cannot be
> ascribed to this event for the simple reason that the sanctity of 'Ashura'
> was established during the days of the Holy Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa
> sallam, much earlier than the birth of Sayyidna Husain, Radi-Allahu anhu.
> On the contrary, it is one of the merits of Sayyidna Husain, Radi-Allahu
> anhu, that his martyrdom took place on the day of 'Ashura'.
> Another misconception about the month of Muharram is that it is an evil or
> unlucky month, for Sayyidna Husain, Radi-Allahu anhu, was killed in it. It
> is for this misconception that people avoid holding marriage ceremonies in
> the month of Muharram. This is again a baseless concept, which is contrary
> to the express teachings of the Holy Quran and the Sunnah. If the death of
> an eminent person on a particular day renders that day unlucky for all times
> to come, one can hardly find a day of the year free from this bad luck
> because every day is associated with the demise of some eminent person. The
> Holy Quran and the Sunnah of the Holy Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam,
> have liberated us from such superstitious beliefs.
> Back to Top
> Lamentations and Mourning
> Another wrong practice related to this month is to hold the lamentation and
> mouming ceremonies in the memory of martyrdom of Sayyidna Husain,
> Radi-Allahu anhu. As mentioned earlier, the event of Karbala is one of the
> most tragic events of our history, but the Holy Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi
> wa sallam, has forbidden us from holding the mourning ceremonies on the
> death of any person. The people of jahiliyyah (ignorance) used to mourn over
> their deceased through loud lamentations, by tearing their clothes and by
> beating their cheeks and chests. The Holy Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa
> sallam, stopped the Muslims from doing all this and directed them to observe
> patience by saying "Innaa lillaahi wa innaa ilayhi raaji'oon". A number of
> authentic Ahaadith are available on the subject. To quote only one of them:
> "He is not from our group who slaps his checks, tears his clothes and cries
> in the manner of the people of jahiliyyah." (Sahih Bukhari)
> All the authentic jurists are unanimous on the point that the mourning of
> this type is impermissible. Even Sayyidna Husain, Radi-Allahu anhu, shortly
> before his demise, had advised his beloved sister Sayyidah Zainab,
> Radi-Allahu anha, at not to mourn over his death in this manner. He said,
> "My dear sister! I swear upon you that in case I die you shall not tear your
> clothes, nor scratch your face, nor curse anyone for me or pray for your
> death." (Al-Kamil, ibn al-Athir vol. 4 pg. 24)
> It is evident from this advice of Sayyidna Husain, Radi-Allahu anhu, that
> this type of mourning is condemned even by the blessed person for the memory
> of whom these mourning ceremonies are held. Every Muslim should avoid this
> practice and abide by the teachings of the Holy Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi
> wa sallam, and his beloved grand child Sayyidna Husain, Radi-Allahu anhu.
> Reference

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Plans inshaAllah



Hey girls, just wanted to let you guys in on my current plans.

InshaAllah I will be going to visit my mom's family during this break and I was wondering, do any of you know good stores in Dallas where I can buy some hijabs/ abayaat?? :-D

Thanks a million!
Also I am in the process of working on a big long post now that inshaAllah will be done soon. It has taken a lot of research and reading as I don't want to be completely wrong or shell out incorrect information as that is haraaaaammmm.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Dear Tuttie



Dear Tuttie,

MashaAllah you are an inspiration. You say what you think and don't take crap from people. You try to better yourself and help better others while maintaining consideration for others' feelings.
You are hilarious and a caring mother.
You are a strong lady who has gone through a lot and it willing to let us learn from it.
You are a great role model and I feel lucky to e-know you :-D

con amor,

Sunday, December 6, 2009

An Ounce of Prevention is worth a Pound of Cure



I was watching a video on Hijab Chic's blog and it got me thinking about jilbab and how an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. So True!!

Jilbab by chastain featuring Aerie

Wednesday, December 2, 2009




So and update for you all is in order.

1. EID MUBARAK!!!! :-D

2. FIIIIINALLY my brother knows that I converted. He totally cornered me about it, lol.

I went to visit my family over the break. I was bummed about missing the prayer and fasting and everything, but subhanAllah I wasn't able to fast or pray at that time, so it wasn't as big a deal and I didn't have to try to hide from anyone which was great! Alhamdulillah!
On the way there, my brother and I were talking in the car and he was talking and talking like usual and somehow we came upon the subject of drinking. He said that he knows Muslims that drink (astaghfirullah) and I got really upset and said "Well I'm not one of them!!!" and of course he picked up on it and said "oh, so you are Muslim now?" and I looked at him and said "yes I am." and that was that.
He said he pretty much knew before and everything because I've changed so much and he was actually really accepting. He said that if Christians practiced their faith like Muslims, that would be most ideal. I told him that becoming Muslim was the best thing I ever did as a Christian. I feel like I am FINALLLLYYYY following the teachings of Jesus (alayhi salam) and doing my best to be a good person in this world, alhamdulillah.
In the end, when we got out of the car, he gave me a big hug and kissed me on the forehead and said that we all have to take our own path. He wishes I was Christian, but recognizes that I am in Gods hands and alienating me is not going to "bring me back to the fold" so to speak. He promised that he would wait for me to be ready to talk to my dad about it, and I assume he and my mom will both be there with me when it happens, so inshaAllah everything will work out alright.

Please make du'a that my family accepts my conversion fully and that they come to see the beauty of Islam and the peace it brings to life!

Monday, November 23, 2009

A Quick Note



31:23 (Yusufali) But if any reject Faith, let not his rejection grieve thee: to Us is their return, and We shall tell them the truth of their deeds: for Allah knows well all that is in (men's) hearts.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

An Idea



This is sort of in response to the last post I guess.

The last few hours I've been seriously considering deferring my scholarship for next semester until the next fall.

1. I will get a break next semester to do something BESIDES school.
2. I will have a light at the end of the tunnel to encourage me to finish out this semester.

1. What if I decide to never go back to school?
2. What if I get out of practice and suck at school when I get back?

I'm really not sure what to think about it... it sounds good but maybe there are things I'm not taking into consideration.

What do you guys think?!?

P.S. If I don't go to school next semester I will probably find a job inshaAllah like substitute teaching, working in an office or something along those lines.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009




I am not motivated to go to school. I am not motivated to do my homework. I am not motivated to study for quizzes and tests.

I am tired all of the time. I can't fall asleep when I need to and when I finally fall asleep, I can't wake up again.

Sometimes I think about sad stuff over and over and over for no apparent reason. I just can't quit. I cry too much and it hurts the people around me.

What is wrong with me? What should I do?

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

My Feelings.



To all of those people who think it is more "liberating" to wear a bikini than an Abaya:

Have you ever worn an abaya by choice?

I have worn both. I feel like that makes my opinion more valid on this subject.

My advice to you...


You can feel sorry for me if you want, but be sure that I'm feeling sorry for you and your women.

An E-mail



I got another e-mail today from a sister at my masjid. She brought up such a good point and I felt like I should share her experience here.

assalamu alaykum sisters

I heard the most disturbing thing today and wanted to share it with you. I was in the Target changing room trying on clothes. Two women were conversing back and forth as they were trying on their clothes. This is how the conversation went:

"Do they(Target) have a separate changing room for the men?"
"Yes, they do."
"Can you believe they are still segregating men and women?"
"Yeah, I know. I guess some women still have insecurities"
"Oh wow! This shirt needs something under it."
"I guess you can wear something under it if you don't feel comfortable."

So, I know this conversation word for word because it was just amazing how these women thought about this issue. Basically, in order to be comfortable with yourself, it means to show your body. It means to discard any conservative outlook you have or any modesty; otherwise you are "insecure" about yourself. I wanted to tell these women that it wasn't insecurity. It was value.

I think from my experience... this is actually a pretty common mindset among people where I live.

Is this common around your area? Why are women letting society take away their value? What is the benefit they see? How do we help them?

Monday, November 9, 2009




Today I got this e-mail from a friend and I thought I would take a little time to analyze it here. Maybe you all got this e-mail too... we know how fast these things like to spread. I will put my analysis in [bold red brackets like this] so that you know it's me :-D

مواقع اسلامية بإدارة يهودية

هذه الرسالة مهمة و خطيرة، تأكد من المواقع بنفسك

Please send this message to all your contacts!!!

الرجاء ارسال هذه الرسالة لكل من تعرف

Beware of the following websites:

انتبهوا من هذه المواقع على الأنترنت:

1. www.answering- [Actually a Christian Website, not Jewish]
www.aboutislam. com [Directs you to a Perfume Store]
www.thequran. com [Gives alternative Interpretation of Ayat... I guess it COULD be Jewish... maybe]
www.allahassurance. com [Site doesn't exist]
These sites have been developed by the Jews [So in total, there is one site above that could be construed... MABYBE... as "Jewish"]

هذه المواقع تم تصميمها من قبل اليهود...

Who intentionally spread wrong information about the QURAN , the HADITH and the Islam?[Yes a lot of the information on these sites is wrong... I would not trust them.]

وهم ينشرون معلومات خاطئة جدّاً عن القرآن والسنة والأحاديث النبويّة الشريفةوالإسلام

Please spread this information to all the Muslim brothers and sisters around the world.

أستحلفكم بالله أن تنشروا هذه الرسالة لكل المسلمين في العالم

Always check the source of any Islamic web site even if it is very convincing [SUCH a great point!!! Everone do this!!!!!]

تأكد دائماً من مصدر المواقع التي تتحدث عن الإسلام

A FAKE AMERICAN QURAAN / com/exec/ obidos/tg/ detail/-/ 1579211755/ qid%3D1096805827 /102-4933271- 2395342 هذا الموقع يباع فيه نسخة محرّفة كاملة عن القرآن الكريم تم تأليفه من قبل اليهود والأمريكان الحاقدين
The new AMERICAN Quran: a dangerous trick a new Quran is being distributed in Kuwait titled 'The True Furqan'[This is actually a book of poetry that is based on the Qur'an, sounds kind of like the Qur'an, and links the Qur'an I think with Trinitarian imagery. Could easily be mistaken for the actual Qur'an Kareem by people who are ignorant, therefore it is pretty dangerous. Go write them a bad review :-P][I also think it is quite telling that this fake Qur'an is "AMERICAN." I love how that is emphasized *sarcastic face* The American part makes it so much worse right??]

المشكلة العظمى أن هذا الكتاب بدأ انتشاره في الكويت بإسم (الفرقان الحق)

You Cant Ignore this, send it to as many muslims as u can.[I honestly don't think this e-mail would have gotten so much attention unless it had the word "Jew" and "AMERICAN" in it in a bad way. This makes me sad... I think we could warn our brothers and sisters in Islam about misinformation without pointing fingers at other Peoples of the Book.]

لا تهملوا هذه الرسالة، إنصر الإسلام ولو برسالة

Anyway, just my thoughts I suppose. What do you guys think?

Friday, November 6, 2009




Nearly 1 in 4 people worldwide is Muslim, report says

  • Story Highlights
  • There are about 1.57 billion Muslims in the world, according to the report
  • Report by the Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life
  • Nearly 2 out of 3 of world's Muslims are in Asia, report says
  • Roughly 9 of 10 Muslims worldwide are Sunni, report says
updated 8:08 a.m. EDT, Mon October 12, 2009

By Richard Allen Greene

(CNN) -- Nearly one in four people worldwide is Muslim -- and they are not necessarily where you might think, according to an extensive new study that aims to map the global Muslim population.

Nearly two out of three of the world's Muslims are in Asia, stretching from Turkey to Indonesia.

Nearly two out of three of the world's Muslims are in Asia, stretching from Turkey to Indonesia.

India, a majority-Hindu country, has more Muslims than any country except for Indonesia and Pakistan, and more than twice as many as Egypt.

China has more Muslims than Syria.

Germany has more Muslims than Lebanon.

And Russia has more Muslims than Jordan and Libya put together.

Nearly two out of three of the world's Muslims are in Asia, stretching from Turkey to Indonesia.

The Middle East and north Africa, which together are home to about one in five of the world's Muslims, trail a very distant second.

There are about 1.57 billion Muslims in the world, according to the report, "Mapping the Global Muslim Population," by the Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life. That represents about 23 percent of the total global population of 6.8 billion.

There are about 2.25 billion Christians, based on projections from the 2005 World Religions Database.

Brian Grim, the senior researcher on the Pew Forum project, was slightly surprised at the number of Muslims in the world, he told CNN.

"Overall, the number is higher than I expected," he said, noting that earlier estimates of the global Muslim population have ranged from 1 billion to 1.8 billion.

The report can -- and should -- have implications for United States policy, said Reza Aslan, the best-selling Iranian-American author of "No God but God."

"Increasingly, the people of the Middle East are making up a smaller and smaller percentage of the worldwide Muslim community," he told CNN by phone.

"When it comes to issues of outreach to the Muslim world, these numbers will indicate that outreach cannot be focused so narrowly on the Middle East," he said.

"If the goal is to create better understanding between the United States and the Muslim world, our focus should be on south and southeast Asia, not the Middle East," he said.

He spoke to CNN before the report was published and without having seen its contents, but was familiar with the general trends the report identified.

The team at the Pew Forum spent nearly three years analyzing "the best available data" from 232 countries and territories, Grim said.

Their aim was to get the most comprehensive snapshot ever assembled of the world's Muslim population at a given moment in time.

So they took the data they gathered from national censuses and surveys, and projected it forward based on what they knew about population growth in each country.

They describe the resulting report as "the largest project of its kind to date."

It's full of details that even the researchers found surprising.

"There are these countries that we don't think of as Muslim at all, and yet they have very sizable numbers of Muslims," said Alan Cooperman, the associate director of research for the Pew Forum, naming India, Russia and China.

One in five of the world's Muslims lives in a country where Muslims are a minority.

And while most people think of the Muslim population of Europe is being composed of immigrants, that's only true in western Europe, Cooperman said.

"In the rest of Europe -- Russia, Albania, Kosovo, those places -- Muslims are an indigenous population," he said. "More than half of the Muslims in Europe are indigenous."

The researchers also were surprised to find the Muslim population of sub-Saharan Africa to be as low as they concluded, Cooperman said.

It has only about 240 million Muslims -- about 15 percent of all the world's Muslims.

Islam is thought to be growing fast in the region, with countries such as Nigeria, which has large populations of both Christians and Muslims, seeing violence between the two groups.

The Pew researchers concluded that Nigeria is just over half Muslim, making it the sixth most populous Muslim country in the world.

Roughly nine out of 10 Muslims worldwide are Sunni, and about one in 10 is Shiite, they estimated.

They warned they were less confident of those numbers than of the general population figures because sectarian data is harder to come by.

"Only one or two censuses in the world ... have ever asked the sectarian question," said Grim.

"Among Muslims it's a very sensitive question. If asked, large numbers will say I am just a Muslim -- not that they don't know, but it is a sensitive question in many places," he said.

One in three of the world's Shiite Muslims lives in Iran, which is one of only four countries with a Shiite majority, he said. The others are Iraq, Azerbaijan, and Bahrain.

Huge as the project of mapping the world's Muslim population is, it is only the first step in a Pew Forum undertaking.

Next year, the think tank intends to release a report projecting Muslim population growth into the future, and then the researchers intend to do the whole thing over again with Christians, followed by other faith groups.

"We don't care only about Muslims," Grim said.

They're also digging into what people believe and practice, since the current analysis doesn't analyze that.

"This is no way reflects the religiosity of people, only their self-identification," Grim said. "We're trying to get the overall picture of religion in the world."


The Rose

What Allah said to the Rose

And caused it to laugh in full blown beauty,

He said to my heart

And made it a hundred times more beautiful.

~ Rumi

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Niqab Hospital Gowns



I found this article the other day and was really excited, lol. Then I noticed it was written in 2006. This would definitely be more sterile and sanitary than bringing in your own niqab/shayla/abaya/covering into the hospital.

I wonder if it ever happened?

anyone know?

Modesty gowns for female patients
Burqua-style hospital gown
The gowns have been designed to comply with religious rules
A gown designed for female Muslim patients who wish to preserve their modesty for religious reasons is being introduced to hospitals in Lancashire.

The £12 outfits - made in Yorkshire - cover the entire head, neck and body, leaving just a slot for the eyes.

The burqua-style gowns come with trousers, two styles of head-dress and elasticated cuffs to prevent women's arms from being revealed.

They will be available to patients at in Chorley and Preston from November.

The gowns were trialled at Royal Preston Hospital and proved so successful that a number of other NHS Trusts have also expressed an interest in offering them.

Preserving modesty

Karen Jacob, linen services manager at Lancashire Teaching Hospitals, came up with the idea.

She said: "I noticed a gap in the market and thought that it would be great if there was a gown that helped to preserve a patient's modesty."

The gowns are believed to be a world first - and TrusTECH, the NHS organisation which manages innovation for the North West NHS - has the patent.

It means the market for the gowns among the globe's billion-plus Muslims is immense.

Tim Meadows, customer service manager for Interweave, the West Yorkshire-based firm which makes the garments, believes the demand for the gowns could be huge.

"We think there is a large market out there," he says.

"We hope it will be a success. We have invested a lot of time and money."

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Kohl vs. Eyeliner




So I have heard around the grapevine that kohl is okay for women to wear because it is sunnah to do so.

I have some questions maybe you guys can answer for me. :-D (i know i'm getting really into this whole question thing... tell me if it bugs you)

1. What are the benefits of kohl that make it sunnah and not just something to make you look prettier?
2. Was it sunnah for the sahabah to wear it, or just the dudes?
3. What is the difference between kohl (specifically) and the eyeliner we can buy at stores here in the U.S.?

I think thats all I've got, thanks girls!!!!

Arab Wannabe??



Today I was reading through some of my favorite blogs and I came across the term "Arab Wannabe" as applied to someone who wears black abaya. I wear black abayat and this hurt my feelings... as if someone were making fun of me for dressing this way because I am not Arab.

(One of my favorites from

It got me thinking... Am I an Arab wannabe because of the way that I dress??

Now I look at my motivation for wearing black abaya most days:
1. I'm poor and alhamdulillah sisters out there GENEROUSLY offered me abayat in order to properly clothe myself when I converted. they just happened to be black. (Thanks Rayyan, and I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE the ones you gave me <3)
2. I like the open style of abaya and it's difficult to find these in other colors.
3. I'm extremely curvy, as Allah made me, and abaya is honestly the only thing I wear that I feel appropriately and modestly covered in.
4. I think they are pretty.

Now as none of my reasons include fitting in with the "Arab" crowd or trying to be "Arab" in anyway, I feel as it is a little rash to label everyone wearing black abaya and shayla as "Arab Wannabe"

So sisters please... don't hurt others feelings in this way. We are all trying our best to please Allah subhana wa ta'ala and we don't need to push each other down.

Friday, October 30, 2009




Okay, I wanted to ask you guys... how do you feel when people dress differently at the masjid or in prayer than they do outside?
I'm not sure if this topic is inappropriate, but it's something I have noticed and wanted to talk about. If you think it is inappropriate or anything, just let me know.

Classificiations by Outifts:
1. Dressing always the same (outside, in the masjid, in prayer)
2. Dressing in a way outside that you would never dress when coming to the masjid, but praying the same way they come to the masjid (like wearing pants in outside life, but never wearing pants to the masjid or to pray)
3. Dressing any way outside and to the masjid, but covering more or differently in prayer (like wearing hijab/no hijab with pants outside and to the masjid, but slip on a loose skirt when you pray)

Which ones do you guys fall into? What do you think of each category? Is this even something you have ever thought about? :-P Is it important to think about how we dress when we pray versus how we dress in "real" life? What is the motivation of dressing this way for each category?

Okay thanks for humoring me :-D

Tuesday, October 27, 2009




A sister asked me some questions, and I felt like I needed to make a post of them. the Q's are her words and the A's are mine. The C's stand for "comment" because I didn't really think it qualified as a question, lol.

Let me know if you have specific questions for me that you want me to answer, or if you can think of something you feel like reading about.

Q: sis, u know i had to ask you this question cuz it means so much to me. In the eastern Pakistani/indian culture kids treat their mothers/fathers like they are gods...astaghfirullah! we are raised up to be extremely leech like on our parents...unlike u converts...who are indepent and thinking adults... which i think is great. how did u deal with giving the emotional blow to ur parents of putting Allah first?
A: Okay so let me clarify first, I've told my mother but not my father or my brother. I haven't actually come to the part yet where I actually have to deliver a "blow." For my mom, alhamdulillah, I knew she would accept my decision and is even pleased that I'm putting God first in my life. My dad, I know will be upset. Believing that Christ is God is more important to him than putting God first in my life. For him (and a lot of Christians that I know) belief is more important than actually walking the walk. InshaAllah when I get to the point where I break the news to my dad and bro, I will let you guys know all about it.

Q: i have to deal with the mental and emotional blow of being the "unthankful and arrogant" child...for someone who grew up with the sole intention of keeping my mom happy....this is really ur relationship with ur are u dealing with "displeasing" them?
A: I take solace in the fact that I'm trying to please my creator. I know this can be hard because mothers are right there physically in your face, but be sure that Allah subhana wa ta'ala is the most merciful and has mercy on those who believe in Him. Every hardship that is shouldered with patience and belief in Allah subhana wa ta'ala is rewarded with a blessing in this life or the next, inshaAllah.

C: sis, also...all my life i thought that kids in the west are very disobedient....but now i think i know that independence is a good people in the subcontinent worships ancestral custom sis...and their parents...not Allah. like now i kids are not allowed to marry who they want...!rather, who their parents want them to marry...i think it is ridiculous.
C: I agree with this comment for sure. Even our Prophet, salAllahu alleyhi wa salam, didn't condone forcing women to marry outside of their choice if they said no, so what right can they claim on us?

Q: i think sis the way u r dealing with ur parents is amazing. like u r trusting Allah...and working and striving..and u know it is a test...and everything will be better...a lot... is the way you are because of which ur parents cant like make u cower into not being what specifically do u keep in mind...when giving Allah prefernce to ur parents???i mean do u manage?
A: First of all, thank you, and alhamdulillah anything I have comes from Allah subhana wa ta'ala. Most of the time, I remember the part in the Qur'an where it talks about the disbelievers asking how were they supposed to do something different than what their fathers did? Wow this always hits me so hard... it makes my heart speed up so fast when I read this. I keep in mind that no matter what my parents think, or my friends, or my extended family thinks, I will have to stand in front of ALLAH SUBHANA WA TA'ALA alllllll ALONE and be accountable for my actions. Standing in front of him will be MILLIONS of times worse than standing in front of everyone on earth. InshaAllah if I stand in front of everyone on earth, it will be easier when I stand for Allah subhana wa ta'ala.

Q: like sis...u didnt give a damn when ur dad was pissed at u for considering islam.. i mean it is so cool. i mean u didnt care if u were the disobedient daugther.
A: Lol I definitely give a damn if my dad is pissed, but like I said above... I am accountable to ALLAH subhana wa ta'ala, and if my dad wants me to do something different than what Allah subhana wa ta'ala does... who is going to win in the long run? My dad, a man, or Allah, the supreme creator of the world and universe and everything that every did, does, or will exist?

Q: i mean it is as if they are blind or something???!!!?? i mean really like how do i deal with their emotional insanity and this slavery of me??? they act as if they are displeased gods or something???
A: This I'm not sure I can give you daily practical advice on. I would say make du'a that the veil is lifted from their eyes and hearts. Pray sincerely for them, especially when you are fasting, not just for your own sake but for theirs as well. Sometimes no matter how well you speak to them, you can't change them from the outside. Allah has to change their hearts first.

Q:i mean it is amazing. u r allaying ur mother's fears sis. it is like a role reversal. can u see?
i think it is amazing. u must be very string in ur iman, sis. u hope for rewards from Allah? and you hope your situation will soon be better?
A: again thank you and alhamdulillah. I think it is funny that you say role reversal, because this has been brought up to me a few times. My parents aren't old, but I often have had to treat them as my children. I cook for them so they don't eat candy all day, I remind them to pay bills, I teach them to cook. I think this is just the way my interaction is with them always. I think that all Muslims hope for reward from Allah sister, else we wouldn't be Muslims. InshaAllah the situation of all of the Muslims in our ummah will be better, ameen.

Sunday, October 25, 2009



Before I started to wear abaya every day because of the convenience and comfortability, my mother was very concerned that I would never be able to wear anything cute ever again because I wanted to dress "modestly."

I made this polyvore set with my mom to help her understand that there can be fashion and individuality with modesty. We had a great time and I think she felt better afterward too.


Daily Style



So this is my Daily Style, if you will.

Usually you can find me in a jalabiya or maxi dress with sleeves, covered up with an abaya (usually an open front kind) and a bright scarf.

I'm also usually in flat sandals, even when it's snowing.

Last but not least an aquamarine ring that my mom got me that looks vaguely like this one and resembles one that my grandmother wore everyday.

What do YOU wear???

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Language Barriers



~ I am feeling very very very included in my community, alhamdulillah. Especially the Saudi sisters have taken me under their wing and made me their favorite little convert, lol. I get invited to tea and dinner and lunch and halaqah. Alhamdulillah it is really great!
~ However... Most of the time they are very happy to speak in Arabic always. Now it should be noted that everyone in the room speaks English and is *mostly* fluent, but I am the only one not fluent in Arabic.
~ Alhamdulillah though I'm getting better at reading the context of the discussion and using my very tiny tiny vocabulary to figure out what is going on.
~ Also mashaAllah a couple of the Saudi sisters are determined to make me fluent in Arabic. Total immersion and the like, lol.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Liberty, Freedom!



One day a couple weeks ago I was at Wal-Mart. I was in the produce section.

As I was walking by the peaches, I saw a little white haired Old Lady looking at me. She looked very Republican, lol, and as is my usual course of action, I gave her a big 'ol southern smile and went on about my business.

So I rounded the corner to get some parsley. I was either making falafel or burgers... anyway the parsley was necessary. As I'm calmly choosing my leafy greens I hear someone whispering behind me.

I don't really pay any attention because really... who cares what people whisper? Then my friend looks at me and goes... uh... I think she's talking to you. I was like what? Who? Huh?

I look over and who do I see but Old Lady, camped out next to the squash section, whispering (lol) "liberty... freedom... liberty... freedom..." gazing intently at my abaya and hijab covered self.


Don't you think that harassing me in the produce section of my local grocery store is a violation of my freedom and liberty?!?

Ugh... it seems they want us to be "liberated"... but only as long as it's THEIR kind of freedom.




I am at a loss for things to say. I don't want to just write stuff so that I have posts up, but I don't want you to be bored either...

What do you guys like to hear about?

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Ramadhan Objectives Revisited



Hey sisters. I've been kind of dreading this post a little bit, because honestly I didn't do as well as I had hoped. Of course I will continue to work on each of these goals throughout the year inshaAllah. I know you all know how excited I was for my first Ramadhan and alhamdulillah it was excellent, but it seems everything started at the same time and I was so swamped... hence no posts.

Anyway here is my goal evaluation post Ramadhan

1. complete all 5 fard prayers PROMPTLY on time
Occasionally I would be a little late, and I slept through fajr once or twice, astaghfirullah. I think this is something we all struggle a little with.
2. pray/incorporate sunnah prayers into my day
I did this as much as time would allow. I tried to do at least one of the sunnah prayers every day.
3. give at least $1 to charity per day
I gave to my masjid, but unfortunately I didn't have enough money to give every day. I tried instead to give my time by volunteering.
4. spend at least one Saturday working at our local soup kitchen
The management of our local soup kitchen has changed and I can't figure out who to contact for this, so I did not achieve this goal.
5. memorize one of the longer surahs
Definitely did not complete this goal. Memorization in a foreign language is way harder than I anticipated it to be, but inshaAllah I will keep trying for this goal!
6. help provide food for iftar at our masjid at least twice (mashaAllah our masjid does iftar every day during Ramadhan!)
I did one iftar and one sahoor after tahajjud and also made food for the Eid morning. Our masjid also had tahajjud prayers every morning the last 10 days.
7. try to cultivate real friendships with women who will help me grown in my deen (thanks to all of you bloggers out there who already help me with this!!!!!!)
AWW YAY I DID THIS ONE!! :-D I made a lot of friends this Ramadhan alhamdulillah!
8. avoid gossip and television
Tried to do both as much as possible, and I watched a significantly less amount of TV than usual. I never turned it on, but would occasionally be in a room with it going.
9. attend Arabic class every day with the intention of learning so that I might read and understand the Qur'an in order to worship Allah better (I will be taking Arabic 1 at university in the fall, inshahAllah)
This was just a question of intention, and I tried to make this my intention before I even stepped into the class the first time. This is always in my mind when I am leaning Arabic.
10. not eat too much at iftar, try to be moderate
I limited myself to one medium sized plate per night, I was only really full once, and I never felt hungry after
11. get in the habit of saying "bismillah" with the intention that everything I do will be in the sight/will of Allah
I did this a little bit, but could do better.
12. attend as many tarawih prayers as possible at the masjid
I only missed a few days while I was sick
13. try to give dawah
A girl I met converted to Islam, alhamdulillah!!! Also 5 Christian girls came to the masjid to learn more about Islam, I think so they can become missionaries, but they were very respectful. I talked to them a lot. The women at our masjid know that I am very familiar with Christianity, so they usually like for me to talk to these people.
14. try to incorporate niqab: I admire the modesty and believe it is better for our hearts. If I believe it is better, why do I not do it? (Please let me know what you think of this one sisters, because I'm not 100% yet!)
I did wear the niqab a few times when I went to the store. It was okay really, and I think that I like it a lot, but my mom has become more and more and more anti niqab as I become more interested in it. Now she is moving toward not liking my abayat as well, so I am trying not to push it because she is the only one in my family on my side.
15. keep my home and myself as clean as possible
I stayed pretty clean, and my room didn't do so bad either :-)

How did you all do on your Ramadhan Goals????

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Hi *blush*



so... wow... hi everyone!

i missed you...

I have been so busy you guys. School started, then Ramadhan, one of my besties got the swine flue *eck* and said bestie is international so they have no family here, so I took care of them *double eck* I felt so bad...

Anyway, the moral of the story is I'm back now, inshaAllah.

So a quick update.
I'll call this section

Ramadan Recap

1. Ramadan went well, alhamulillah! I reached some goals and didn't reach others. InshaAllah this will be another post soon.
2. I made TONS of new girlfriends, YAY!!!! and spent so much time at the masjid, alhamdulillah. I've never had girlfriends before and it's just been a total blast.
3. I'm learning Arabic. I take an hour to hour and a half of Arabic class every day (that is 6 hours per week), and I'm starting to be able to read some Qur'an now *mashaAllah*
4. I got two sort of weird unofficial marriage offers, lol. more on this later as well.
5. My dad and brother still don't know that I've converted even though they know that I wear hijab and abaya... I think they just pretend to not know...
6. There is a baby at my masjid and his name is Noor. Okay there are a lot of babies, but this baby is just the bees knees, mashaAllah! He is Yemeni and he is between 9 months and a year. I want to take him and keep him forever, lol. I think my hormones are playing with me.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

First day of Ramadhan!



So RAMADHAN MUBARAK everyone out there!!!!

Fasting Today:
I woke up and there was no food in the house, lol. I had stale bread and peanutbutter with water for suhoor, and alhamdulillah that I had at least that much!
Around 7 o'clock (we break fast here at around 8) my dad decides to order my FAVORITE pizza. I was like... dad I have to go. He was like, don't you want some pizza? *curious/shocked face* and I was like... uhm no thanks. He still doesn't know that I converted so therefore has no idea that I'm fasting.
Alhamdulillah I got hungry, but not too hungry. InshaAllah it keeps getting better and better.

May Allah accept your fasts and prayers, protect you from the fire, and give you the best in this life and the next, ameen!

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Friday, August 21, 2009

Sunnah Prayers II



I have done more research and made another table of Sunnah prayers! I included the prayer name, time, # rakaat, and benefits to help motivate us all inshaAllah!I also left a square open at the front if you want to print the list and check it off at the end of the day :-D

It should also be noted that if you add these prayers, it is better to keep them consistent, even if you only add one per day.

The Prophet Muhammad (Allah bless him and give him peace) said to Ibn Umar (Allah be pleased with him), “O Abd Allah! Do not be like so-and-so. He used to pray at night and then left it.” [Bukhari and Muslim] Therefore, one should take on an amount of works one can sustain, for the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace be upon him, his family, and companions) said, “The most beloved of actions to Allah are the most constant, even if little.” [Bukhari and Muslim] [Ibn Abidin, Radd al-Muhtar, from Ibn Amir Haajj’s Halba]

If you can't read the words after you download the picture, just e-mail me at findingguidance AT gmail DOT com and I will send you the original word document inshaAllah!

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Are you Hot in that?



Okay I feel like everyone who doesn't live at the north and/or south pole has heard this question before.

"Oh MY, aren't you HOT wearing that scarf?!?"

My favorite answer...?

"No ma'am, I'm wearing this scarf because I AM hot!" *wink*

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Heart Wheel Journal



The other day I was reading blogs and I came across a coment on one of the posts. I can't remember whose blog it was, or who made the comment, but they suggested that the person go to to look up something called a Heart Wheel Journal. I had no idea what this was, so I clicked the link, but it didn't work, so I was still in the dark.

Today, subhanAllah, I decided to google it and I found the website and the Heart Wheel Journal is just FANTASTIC!!!! MashaAllah, it has a lot of good reminders and prompts you to really think about getting closer to Allah every day.

The link is **HERE** and I strongly encourage everyone to download it and at least look it through and see if you like it! It only takes just a few seconds, and I think that it will be worth it, inshaAllah.

Let me know what you think!!!!!

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Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Sunnah Prayers



One of my goals this Ramadhan is to incorporate the Sunnah Prayers into my day. I figured I needed to find when all of the Sunnah Prayers were and how to execute so I found this really handy table!

from **this website**

Hope that this is helpful!

Little Children :-D



MASHAALLAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! InshaAllah I will be able to teach my children (if I am so fortunate to have them) this well!!!


*On a side note* My mom saw this and was really offended that it called Christians "the misguided." She doesn't believe everything that Christians believe, but still considers herself one, so this was very "personal" to her. So if you know someone under the same circumtances, best avoid showing them this video.


Bismillah, the first verse of the first "...Image via Wikipedia



I keep having dreams. Not really bad dreams, so I don't feel bad talking about it, just weird dreams.

You know how people have those dreams where they are going about daily life, then they realize they are naked in public? Well I have dreams that I am going about daily life, then I realize that I'm not wearing hijab.

I heard a long time ago that this happens when people are nervous about something, like going back to school or public speaking or something. Maybe that is my problem: I'm nervous about something. Don't really know what... but yeah, lol.

It just reminds me how attached I am to my hijab, alhamdulillah.

Do you guys have weird recurring dreams too?

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Monday, August 10, 2009

Award from Laila of Course!



Today I recieved an award from Laila at selections in the life of a muslim girl!!!! It was her first award and my first award too, awwww! :-D *big cheesy grin*

In the words of Laila, "in keeping with the tradition of bringing up the spirits of 6 lovely blogs that need encouragement or some material appreciation" I would like to pass this award on to:


The Light of Islam


Malizea at Simply Ramadan

Fatimah at Forever Fatimah

Stacy aka Fahiima from Livin in Layla Land

Sunday, August 9, 2009




I was reading a website called "Holla Back New York" where people who live in New York City can report harassment. They can submit location, time, pictures, etc. in order to shame the harassers and also to help others avoid that situation.

I came across **this** report and I just thought, wow... SubhanAllah, Allahu Alim.
*note* the post I linked to does have some foul language, fyi

This girl was being harassed and what did she do?!?! She wrapped her scarf around her head and shoulders to protect herself.


Thursday, August 6, 2009

Ramadhan Objectives



I weekly attend a halaqah (sort of study group) with several ladies at my local masjid. We share with eachother the things that we have learned. One of the ladies challenged us this week to create a list of our objectives for Ramadhan this year so that we can mark our progress and really keep ourselves focused on bettering ourselves for the pleasure of Allah subhana wa ta'ala!

I was thinking of saving this post until two weeks before Ramadhan, but I think the sooner we all start thinking about it, the better ;-)

Okay so the following will be a list of my goals for this Ramadhan, inshaAllah. This will be my first Ramadhan and could very well be my last Ramadhan so I hope to make it worth it, inshaAllah. Also who even knows if we will make it to Ramadhan... so I'm trying to start now on these goals as well.

If you have goals that you are planning on, or if you do a post about this as well please let me know because I definitely would like input on this!!!!!

1. complete all 5 fard prayers PROMPTLY on time
2. pray/incorporate sunnah prayers into my day
3. give at least $1 to charity per day
4. spend at least one Saturday working at our local soup kitchen
5. memorize one of the longer surahs
6. help provide food for iftar at our masjid at least twice (mashaAllah our masjid does iftar every day during Ramadhan!)
7. try to cultivate real friendships with women who will help me grown in my deen (thanks to all of you bloggers out there who already help me with this!!!!!!)
8. avoid gossip and television
9. attend Arabic class every day with the intention of learning so that I might read and understand the Qur'an in order to worship Allah better (I will be taking Arabic 1 at university in the fall, inshahAllah)
10. not eat too much at iftar, try to be moderate
11. get in the habit of saying "bismillah" with the intention that everything I do will be in the sight/will of Allah
12. attend as many tarawih prayers as possible at the masjid
13. try to give dawah
14. try to incorporate niqab: I admire the modesty and believe it is better for our hearts. If I believe it is better, why do I not do it? (Please let me know what you think of this one sisters, because I'm not 100% yet!)
15. keep my home and myself as clean as possible

These are what I have come up with so far! Please comment and let me know what you think.. additions, subtractions, general thoughts, etc.

I pray that we all make it to Ramadhan this year in order to worship Allah during that holy month!! Ameen

Sunday, August 2, 2009

Finding Friendship...



Growing up, I was always more comfortable around guys. I have one brother and spent all my time playing with him and the other neighborhood boys. Once I got to school, it was just a given that all of my friends there would be guys. Girls were wayyyyy too confusing for me...

As I matured, girls did not enjoy my close friendships with "their" boys and so making friends with girls was even harder.

Eventually I went to college I made more friends (some girls), mostly guys. Finally I fell in with a crowd of Muslim guys. I know you are thinking... haram... these guys should know better than to hang out with girls!!! And you are right of course, but we became friends never the less and I positively INUNDATED them with questions about Islam. So inshaAllah they will be rewarded for dawah even though I was a chick.

Okay so I started to love Islam and decided to convert. As a result, I decided to stop hanging out with these guys. I decided to stop hanging out with ALL guys unless it was unavoidable (like in classes and study groups and such). SO as a result of this result (lol) I find myself with a religion I love and no friends.

I have of course met many ladies at the masjid, but all of them are much older than me and so don't share my views or problems. I made a friend online here and we talk a lot and I love her dearly as if she were my very own (little) sister :-P However sometimes I just want to get OUT of the house, lol.

So I prayed that I would be given HALAL friends (lol) that would help me practice my deen and also keep me occupied and SUBHANALLAH I met two Albanian sisters today at the masjid and I'm going to hang out with them tomorrow. They seem to have the same kind of background and sense of humor that I do and I am SO excited to become friends, inshaAllah!!

Okay that was just my exciting news for the day as well as a smidge more background :-D
Love you girls!!!!
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