Sunday, August 2, 2009

Finding Friendship...



Growing up, I was always more comfortable around guys. I have one brother and spent all my time playing with him and the other neighborhood boys. Once I got to school, it was just a given that all of my friends there would be guys. Girls were wayyyyy too confusing for me...

As I matured, girls did not enjoy my close friendships with "their" boys and so making friends with girls was even harder.

Eventually I went to college I made more friends (some girls), mostly guys. Finally I fell in with a crowd of Muslim guys. I know you are thinking... haram... these guys should know better than to hang out with girls!!! And you are right of course, but we became friends never the less and I positively INUNDATED them with questions about Islam. So inshaAllah they will be rewarded for dawah even though I was a chick.

Okay so I started to love Islam and decided to convert. As a result, I decided to stop hanging out with these guys. I decided to stop hanging out with ALL guys unless it was unavoidable (like in classes and study groups and such). SO as a result of this result (lol) I find myself with a religion I love and no friends.

I have of course met many ladies at the masjid, but all of them are much older than me and so don't share my views or problems. I made a friend online here and we talk a lot and I love her dearly as if she were my very own (little) sister :-P However sometimes I just want to get OUT of the house, lol.

So I prayed that I would be given HALAL friends (lol) that would help me practice my deen and also keep me occupied and SUBHANALLAH I met two Albanian sisters today at the masjid and I'm going to hang out with them tomorrow. They seem to have the same kind of background and sense of humor that I do and I am SO excited to become friends, inshaAllah!!

Okay that was just my exciting news for the day as well as a smidge more background :-D
Love you girls!!!!


Stacy aka Fahiima said...

That's awesome! I know exactly what you mean. I always had waaaaay more guy friends too, but now I only even talk to a few guys other than my husband and brother ;)

I have 3 close girl friends from High School. One of them lives in Seattle, one in Illinois, and the other is moving here to Portland from Chicago in a couple weeks. She's my best friend ever and I'm so excited! Quality is more important than quantity when it comes to friends for sure.

The online variety of friends are great too! I have one friend online who got in contact with a friend of hers who lives near me and has kids near Layla's age, and is also married to a Somali. I am so excited to meet her very soon!

Shizra said...

aww i hope you make some good friends hun i know how hard it can be to find the right ones. =)

Candice said...

It's so hard to make friends! I hate that I don't see friends very often at all either... The one I used to see the most now works with me so I don't see her outside work as much since we kinda see each other a lot at work!

Other than that, my friends are outside the city and so it's not convenient to see them. And someone I met recently, a Muslimah! Well she works nights and I work days so it's hard to meet up.

I hope the new people you're meeting up with turn out to become good friends for you!

Nashe^ said...

WOW. I'm so impressed at what I see here. I was born a Muslim but I'm still finding my way.

Dedra said...

hey, we could totally be long distance friends lol I live in Michigan and there are TONS of Muslims, but lets just say I tend to get nervous ... just a tad.

M. Umer Toor said...

Really happy to see Allah helped you.

Safyiah said...

Salamo aleikom from Portugal =D

Sis, i know what you're going through. i didn't have many guys as friends but i pratically lost all my friends after converting to Islam. well, it's their loss =P
I converted almost 4 years ago and this year i met 2 girls that want to know about Islam, so i became their teacher friend lol. It's all about patience and asking Allah (swt).

Take care sis =)

NeverEver said...

@ Fahiima: Hey, I'm so glad to hear that your life is starting to get more rooted in Portland, making friends and even having one move near!! how exciting!!!! I totally agree with quality > quantity.

@ Shizra: :-D thank you!! I really love knowing there are people out there who understand what is going on, it just makes my day!!!!

@ Candice: I hope all of your scheduling/ geographical friend blocks end up working themselves out sis!!! Thanks for the wishes :)

@ Nashe: Yeah, I think it is this way for a lot of people born into Islam. InshaAllah you will find the straight path again. I will make du3a for you sis!

@ Dedra: I just read like... you're whole blog, lol. I would be disappointed if we did NOT become long distance buddies... serioiusly. like sad.

@ Safia: Wa alaikum a salam!! Yes DEFINITELY their loss and InshaAllah you will lead those girls to the SIRAT AL-MUSTAQIM!! What better gift could you give to a friend, eh??

Safyiah said...

yeah, that's what i thought, hehe
inshaAllah, sis

.::Tuttie::. said...

i was on the same boat as you when i converted. If you live in CT or NJ we can hang out if you like?

NeverEver said...

Aw, that would be great, but I live in Arkansas... :( it's pretty far away. But thank you for the offer!!! inshaAllah we will be internet friends :-D

Fatimah said...

I see the dilemma! Hope you still hang out with those girls :) Once you figure them out.. they're not so bad! It's nice to have sister like friends!

NeverEver said...

Yeah, we are still hanging out a little, alhamdulillah. You are very right, once you figure out what girls are thinking (lol) they are actually really awesome! I think a big part of it is also just finding the right kind of girls. The kind that will love you for the sake of Allah subhana wa ta'ala, not just because they think you can do something for them. :-D YAY MUSLIMAHS!!!

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