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Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Common mistakes in Ramadhan

Salam 3laikum,

Bismillah

I just got this email from our sisters email group. Anything that I add will be in [brackets] as usual.


Some Common Mistakes in Ramadaan

Lets Strive Not to Repeat the Same.

By Asma bint Shameem

1 : Taking Ramadaan as a ritual

For many of us Ramadaan has lost its spirituality and has become more of a ritual than a form of Ibaadah. We fast from morning to night like a zombie just because everyone around us is fasting too. We forget that its a time to purify our hearts and our souls from all evil....we forget to make dua, forget to beseech Allaah to forgive us and ask Him to save us from the Fire. Sure we stay away from food and drink but that's about all.

Although the Prophet (PBUH) said: “Jibreel said to me, May Allaah rub his nose in the dust, that person to who Ramadaan comes and his sins are not forgiven, and I said, Ameen. Then he said, May Allaah rub his nose in the dust, that person who lives to see his parents grow old, one or both of them, but he does not enter Paradise (by not serving them) and I said, Ameen. Then he said, May Allaah rub his nose in the dust, that person in whose presence you are mentioned and he does not send blessings upon you, and I said, Ameen.’”

(Tirmidhi, Ahmad, others. Saheeh by al-Albaani)

2 : Too much stress on food and drink

For some people, the entire month of Ramadaan revolves around food. They spend the ENTIRE day planning, cooking, shopping and thinking about only food, instead of concentrating on Salaah, Quraan and other acts of worship. All they can think of is FOOD. So much so that they turn the month of fasting into the month of feasting. Come Iftaar time, their table is a sight to see, with the multitudes and varieties of food, sweets and drinks. They are missing the very purpose of fasting, and thus, increase in their greed and desires instead of learning to control them. It is also a kind of waste & extravagance. ".....and eat and drink but waste not by extravagance, certainly He (Allaah) likes not Al-Musrifoon (those who waste by extravagance)" [al-Araaf :31]

3 : Spending all day cooking

Some of the sisters (either by their own choice or forced by their husbands) are cooking ALL day and ALL night, so that by the end of the day, they are too tired to even pray Ishaa, pray Taraweeh or Tahajjud or even read Quraan. This is the month of mercy and forgiveness. So turn off that stove and turn on your Imaan!

4 : Eating too much

Some people stuff themselves at Suhoor until they are ready to burst, because they think this is the way to not feel hungry during the day and some people eat at Iftaar, like there is no tomorrow, trying to make up for the food missed. However, this is completely against the Sunnah. Moderation is the key to everything.

The Prophet (PBUH) said: "The son of Adam does not fill any vessel worse than his stomach; for the son of Adam a few mouthfuls are sufficient to keep his back straight. If you must fill it, then one-third for food, one-third for drink and one-third for air." (Tirmidhi, Ibn Maajah. saheeh by al-Albaani). Too much food distracts a person from many deeds of obedience and worship, makes him lazy and also makes the heart heedless.

5 : Sleeping all day

Some people spend their entire day (or a major part of it) sleeping away their fast. Is this what is really required for us during this noble month? These people also are missing the purpose of fasting and are slaves to their desires of comfort and ease. They cannot bear to be awake and face a little hunger or exert a little self-control. For a fasting person to spend most of the day asleep is nothing but, negligence on his part.

6 : Wasting time

The month of Ramadaan is a precious time, so much, that Allaah calls this month "Ayyamum Madoodaat" (A fixed number of days).Before we know it, this month of mercy and forgiveness will be over. We should try and spend every moment possible in the worship of Allaah so that we can make the most of this blessing. However, there are some of us who waste away their day playing video games, watching TV, movies or even listening to music. Subhaan Allaah! Trying to obey Allaah by DISOBEYING him!

7 : Fasting but not giving up evil

Some of us fast but do not give up lying, cursing, fighting, backbiting, etc. and some of us fast but do not give up cheating, stealing, dealing in haraam, buying lotto tickets, selling alcohol, fornication, etc. and all kinds of impermissible things without realizing that the purpose of fasting is to not stay away from food and drink; rather the aim behind it is to fear Allaah.

“O you who believe! Fasting is prescribed for you as it was prescribed for those before you, that you may become Al-Muttaqoon (the pious)” [al-Baqarah 2:183]

The Prophet (PBUH) said: "Whoever does not give up false speech and acting upon it, and ignorance, Allaah has no need of him giving up his food and drink." (Bukhaari)

8 : Smoking

Smoking is forbidden in Islam whether during Ramadaan or outside of it, as it is one of al-Khabaaith (evil things). And this includes ALL kinds of smoking material eg.cigars, cigarettes, pipes, hookah etc.

9 : Skipping Suhoor

The Prophet (PBUH) said: "Eat suhoor, for in suhoor there is blessing."(Bukhaari, Muslim). "The thing that differentiates between our fasting and the fasting of the People of the Book is eating suhoor." (Muslim)

10 : Stopping Suhoor at Imsaak

Some people stop eating Suhoor 10-15 minutes earlier than the time of Fajr to observe Imsaak. This is a kind of bidah (innovation)."…and eat and drink until the white thread (light) of dawn appears to you distinct from the black thread (darkness of night)" [al-Baqarah 2:187]. And the Prophet (pbuh) said: "….eat and drink until you hear the adhaan of Ibn Umm Maktoom, for he does not give the adhaan until dawn comes." This imsaak is a kind of extremism in religion, and the Prophet (PBUH) said: "Those who go to extremes are doomed, those who go to extremes are doomed, those who go to extremes are doomed." (Muslim)

11 : Not fasting if they missed Suhoor

Some people are too scared to fast if they miss Suhoor. However, this is a kind of cowardice and love of ease. What is the big deal if you missed a few morsels of food? Its not like you will die. Remember, obedience to Allaah overcomes everything.

12 : Saying the intention to fast out loud or saying a specific dua to start fasting The intention is an action of the heart. We should resolve in our heart that we are going to fast tomorrow. That is all we need. It is not prescribed by the Shariah for us to say out loud, "I intend to fast", "I will fast tomorrow" or other phrases that have been innovated by some people. Also, there is no specific dua to be recited at the time of starting the fast in the correct Sunnah. Whatever dua you may see on some papers or Ramadaan calendars, etc. is a Bidah.

13 : Delaying breaking fast

Some people wait until the adhaan finishes or even several minutes after that, just to be on the safe side. However, the Sunnah is to hasten to break the fast, which means breaking fast whenever the adhaan starts, right after the sun has set. Aaishah (RA) said: This is what the Messenger of Allaah (PBUH) used to do. (Muslim). The Prophet (PBUH) said: "The people will continue to do well so long as they hasten to break the fast." (Bukhaari, Muslim). Determine to the best of your ability, the accuracy of your clock, calendar, etc. and then have tawakkul on Allaah and break your fast exactly on time.

14 : Eating continuously until the time for Maghrib is up

Some people put so much food in their plates when breaking their fast and continue eating, enjoying dessert, drinking tea, etc., until they miss Maghrib. The Sunnah of the Prophet (pbuh) was that once he broke his fast with some dates, then he would hasten to the prayer. Once you are done with the prayer, you can always go back and eat some more if you wish.

15 : Missing the golden chance of having your Dua accepted

The prayer of the fasting person is guaranteed to be accepted at the time of breaking fast. The Prophet (PBUH) said: "Three prayers are not rejected: the prayer of a father, the prayer of a fasting person, and the prayer of a traveler." (al-Bayhaqi, saheeh by al-Albaani). Instead of sitting down and making Dua at this precious time, some people forego this beautiful chance, and are too busy frying samosas, talking, setting the food, filling their plates and glasses, etc. Think about it....Is food more important than the chance to have your sins forgiven or the fulfillment of your Duas.

16 : Fasting but not praying

The fasting of one who does not pray WILL NOT BE ACCEPTED. This is because not praying constitutes kufr as the Prophet (PBUH) said: "Between a man and shirk and kufr there stands his giving up prayer." (Muslim). In fact, NONE of his good deeds will be accepted; rather, they are all annulled.

17 : Fasting and not wearing Hijaab

Not wearing the Hijaab is a sin as it is obligatory for Muslim women. (See Surah Nur, Surah Ahzaab). So fasting and not wearing hijaab certainly takes away enormously from the rewards of fasting, even if does not invalidate it.

[I want to note that this goes for guys too, not just ladies. You guys playing soccer or going to class out there in your short shorts and sagging pants... haraaaam! the area below your belly button, your butt, your thighs, and your knees are all for your ladies alone so have some respect and cover up!]

18 : Not fasting because of exams or work

Exams or work is NOT one of the excuses allowed by the Shariah to not fast. You can do your studying and revision at night if it is too hard to do that during the day. Also remember that pleasing and obeying Allaah is much more important than good grades. Besides, if you will fulfill your obligation to fast, even if you have to study, Allaah will make it easy for you and help you in everything you do.

"Whosoever fears Allah, He will appoint for him a way out and provide for him from where he does not expect, Allah is Sufficient for whosoever puts his trust in Him." (Surah at-Talaaq 2-3)

19 : Mixing fasting and dieting

DO NOT make the mistake of fasting with the intention to diet. That is one of the biggest mistakes some of us make (sp. sisters). Fasting is an act of worship and can only be for the sake of Allah alone. Mixing it with the intention of dieting may become a form of (minor) Shirk.

20 : Fighting over the number of Rakaah of Taraweeh

There is no specific number of rakahs for Taraweeh prayer, rather it is permissible to do a little or a lot. Both 8 and 20 are okay.

21 : Praying ONLY on the night of the 27th

Some people pray ONLY on the 27th to seek Lailat ul-Qadr, neglecting all other odd nights, although the Prophet (PBUH) said:"Seek Lailat ul-Qadr among the odd numbered nights of the last ten nights of Ramadaan." (Bukhaari, Muslim).

22 : Wasting the last part of Ramadaan preparing for Eid

Some people waste the entire last 10 days of Ramadaan preparing for Eid, shopping and frequenting malls, etc. neglecting Ibadah and Lailatul Qadr. although, the Prophet (PBUH) used to strive the hardest during the last ten days of Ramadaan in worship (Ahmad, Muslim) and not in shopping. Buy whatever you need for Eid before Ramadaan so that you can utilize the time in Ramadaan to the max.

Aaishah (RA) said: “When the (last) ten nights began, the Messenger of Allaah (PBUH)) would tighten his waist-wrapper (i.e., strive hard in worship or refrain from intimacy with his wives), stay awake at night and wake his family.” (Bukhaari and Muslim).

23 : Iftaar parties

Although inviting each other for breaking fast is something good and encouraged, some people go to extremes with lavish Iftaar parties with all sorts of disobedience to Allaah, from flirting, mixing of the sexes and hijaab-less women, to show-off and extravagance, to heedlessness to Salaah and Taraweeh, even to music and dancing.

7 comments:

CHII❤QU said...

Alhamdulillah~ thank you for this great post! I love your blog so much dear : ) : ) It always helps me.

I want to re-post this for an up-coming reminder post. Do you mind? x3 It's such a great post! (I'll give you credit back hehe)

xx

I hope you're doing well!

NeverEver said...

yeah of course sis no problem!

alhamdulillah glad it was helpful :-D

Riham said...

this is so helpful, jazakAllah kheir

1beautyofislam.blogspot.com

NeverEver said...

alhamdulillah i'm glad you found it useful Riham!

rose water said...

Masha'Allah sister!! This was such a great list and reminders! Jazakallah khair for posting it!

NeverEver said...

alhamdulillah glad it was helpful for you sis rose water!!

Stephi said...

Peace be upon you as we are approaching such a wonderful month for all of us.
Sister, I hope you do not take me wrong in my inquiry, for I feel that you have many good points! but what exactly is Taraweeh, when did it start and why is it that you do it? My first impression is that it is, as you referred to as some of the other Ramadhan practices an "innovation" and could also be seen as "extremism". However, I am sure that it has some good purpose to it, as so many people apparently do it. Could you please elaborate?

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