Modest Babies

Salam!

Bismillah

Ok I was reading about Mother Teresa and I saw this adorable little baby. I decided to do a compilation of adorableness since I haven't done that in a while :-P

Baby Mother Teresa

Little girl, Persian maybe? It looks like an open chador

Beautiful little Pakistani Girl

I realllly dig her awesome glasses!

A little Bandana Girl

I am in no way trying to advocate girls this little wearing hijab because I think it is something that you need to be old enough to understand and choose, but aren't they just sooooo adorable dressed like grown-ups?? MashaAllah!

How to Hijab: Wrap Up

Salam!

Bismillah

So ladies, this is the end of How to Hijab. For now anyway. Maybe inshaAllah one day I will add an appendix about How to Niqab :-P

I've shown you how I made it to where I am. Also, I would like to talk about the timeline involved with this.

I started learning about Islam about 8 or 9 months before I converted. I almost immediately started with step one at that point and I got to step 6 by the time I converted. So it took me about 8 months to wear hijab full time. It took me another month or so after I converted to get to step 7.

I know this isn't an on and off switch kind of thing. And I'm not saying you need to follow my timeline either.

Find the pace that works for you. Set goals for yourself if you need to. For example: InshaAllah This week I will do step 1, next week I will start step 2, next month I will start step 3... etc.

Make sure that your end goal is to wear complete and proper hijab inshaAllah. Focus on that and know that any step from here until then is a stepping stone on the road to modesty. The journey isn't over until you make it to the end.

And through it all, make LOTS AND LOTS of du'a. Allah wants you to do what he commanded, and He is on your side subhanAllah. Sincerity is the key :-) Be sincere in your efforts and be honest with yourself about your intentions.

Please sisters, let me know if you need someone to talk to about this or anything else. Feel free to email me at findingguidance (at) hotmail (dot) com or add me on facebook under the same email.

Allah make it easy for you, ameeeeeeen!!!!!

much love.

How to Hijab: Step 7/7

Salam

Bismillah!

So we've made it to step 7. This step is the step where I went from skirts and maxi dresses to abaya.

Step 8 by chastain featuring a maxi dress

This was a personal choice for me, but one that I definitely advocate.

One piece outerwear is really convenient and cuts down on layers (which keeps you a lot cooler once it starts warming up).

Also it is MUCH MUCH easier to find modest cuts when you are looking at abayas/jilbabs.

However, if you want to still buy clothes from a regular store, you can occasionally find long sleeve maxi dresses. Just buy them up a few sizes so that they are loose enough to conceal your stuff.

Another benefit is the ease of getting dressed every morning. You spend less time on vanity (making your outfit look nice so other people will notice/comment on your cuteness). I'm not saying that you should look frumpy or anything. You should still wear nice clean clothes in good repair that match. However, you shouldn't be spending an hour or two every morning picking shoes then matching your shoes to your top and your jacket and your skirt and your hijab and your hijab pins and and and...

This is a waste of your time, and ultimately a means of vanity; a way of getting attention. It is counter productive if we cover up our adornment with MORE ADORNMENT!

How to Hijab: Step 6/7

Salam!

Bismillah

Step 6 is getting that hair covered! I know most people think this is the most important step of hijab, but really all of the other stuff is much more important! Imagine throwing a scarf on your head while still wearing a t-shirt and jeans... makes no sense right? The loose clothes are much more important.

Step 7 by chastain featuring a rachel pally dress

NOW WE FINALLY HAVE HIJAB!! We are wearing loose and concealing clothes, our hair/chests are covered, and you can't tell our body shape.

When donning your scarf, look for options that COVER YOUR CHEST!!

I know you will be temped to try out that new Turkish style, but girl that doesn't fulfill Qur'anic requirements!

And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their zeenah (charms, or beauty and ornaments) except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their khimar (veils) over their bosoms and not display their zeenah except to their husbands, their fathers .... and that they should not strike their feet so as to draw attention to their hidden zeenah (ornaments). (24:31-32)

Did you read that? Clear as day it says COVER UP THOSE BOSOMS with your veils!

So do it.

How to Hijab: Step 5/7

Salam!

Bismillah

Step 5 is making sure that you are wearing two layers.

Step 6 by chastain featuring a tank dress

Why you ask? Let me tell you...

O Prophet! Tell your wives and daughters and the believing women that they should draw over themselves their jilbab (outer garments) (when in public); this will be more conducive to their being recognized (as decent women) and not harassed. But God is indeed oft-forgiving, most merciful. (33:59)

And know that women advanced in years, who no longer feel any sexual desire incur no sin if they discard their thiyab (outer garments), provided they do not aim at a showy display of their zeenah (charms or beauty). But it is better for them to abstain (from this); and God is all-hearing, all-knowing. (24:60)

We should draw our Jilbab (outer garments) around us. This means there should be something INSIDE our outside clothes.

If a woman is allowed to take off her thiyab (outer garments) when she is advanced in years, is she now allowed to walk around naked or in her underwear? No. Now she is allowed to wear the clothes she had on inside. This means that the clothes she wears inside her outer garments should also be modest enough to not display your charms or beauty, but still somewhat different than the recognized outer garment.

My rule of thumb: my inside clothes should be modest enough that I could take off my jilbab (outside layer) and still be able to be around other women. This means no inordinate amount of chest showing (because thats icky) and you should be covered from your belly button down to below your knees (this is awrah for women around other women, just like it is awrah for men).

How to Hijab: Step 4/7

Salam!

Bismillah

Step 4 is switching out jeans and slim pants for skirts and maxi dresses. I know some people consider pants to be proper hijab, but I don't/they aren't. I will be explaining why in the next post so stay tuned.

Step 5 by chastain featuring a denim jacket

Now we're getting pretty modest right! Now, apart from our hair/neck no part of our body shape is apparent or on display, alhamdulillah. We are getting there!

How to Hijab: Step 3/7

Salam

Bismillah

Step 3 is adding a scarf around your neck. It keeps you cozy if it's cold and more importantly it keeps your chest covered! THIS IS STILL NOT HIAJB, but inshaAllah a step in the right direction.

Step 4 by chastain featuring plaid scarves

Alhamdulillah this is in fashion now so no complaining!

If you're already carrying/wearing a scarf every day, it won't feel weird to eventually pop it up over your head. Plus you get the added modesty of covering up the "twins" as Stacy and Clinton say. :-)

How to Hijab: Some Clarification

Salam!

Bismillah

Because there has been a little confusion I decided to clarify a bit for you all.

The posts I have done so far represent positive change toward a more modest wardrobe. They DO NOT fulfill the Islamic requirements of hijab. I will cover this in more detail in later posts.

I will not be showing an outfit that is proper hijab until about post 6 or 7.

These early posts are about making positive changes instead of being stagnant and *wishing* you could wear hijab. It is about being proactive.

It is also a chronicle of what worked for me. This is how I actually went through the process but something different may work better for you.

In any event, slapping a scarf on Step 2 is not proper hijab, and I don't want to represent it as such.

I think inshaAllah I will go back on put disclaimers on the other posts as well.

much love.

How to Hijab: Step 2/7

Salam!

Bismillah

Step Two: Loosen and Lengthen!

THIS IS NOT HIJAB YET, JUST MORE MODEST CLOTHES THAN BEFORE

Switch out short t-shirts for long ones, tunics, or dresses that cover your tush and thighs.

Step 3 by chastain featuring a long sleeve t shirt

A good self-check for this one: If you bend over to pick something up from the floor, can someone behind you see your rear? They shouldn't be able to...

Nobody wants to see that girl...

Cheap places to find this stuff? Thrift stores. You can find tunic things there and also XXL t-shirts. If you are kind of short you can take an XXL t-shirt and sew in the sides to make a cool and cheap tunic inshaAllah.

How to Hijab: Step 1/7

Salam!

Bismillah

For step one toward hijabness... (THIS IS NOT HIJAB, JUST A STEP IN A MORE MODEST DIRECTION INSHAALLAH)

ADD SLEEVES

Step 2 by chastain featuring a short sleeve tee

The first thing to do is to get yourself use to wearing something that covers all of your body. It is an adjustment for the way your body cools and heats itself so it is good to get this step going while it is still cool/cold outside! This way you don't feel overheated when you first start covering all parts of yourself.

Also at this point, you can start wearing looser t-shirts and cardigans (instead of just sleeves under a t-shirt).

Best place for cheap, loose t-shirts? Brother/Uncle/Dad's closet! I'm telling you, your dad probably has some really sweet t-shirts from the 70s/80s. Go look for 'em!

How to Hijab: Introduction

Salam!

Bismillah

So I decided to go ahead and do it since I had some time to put it together.

This is a pictorial guide to how I transitioned from jeans and t-shirts to full on hijab/jilbab/abaya wearing awesomeness :-P

Alhamdulillah it was quite the process and I will walk you through it inshaAllah!

Step 1 by chastain featuring dark wash jeans

THIS IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT ANY KIND OF HIJAB.

This is where I started. Jeans, t-shirts, hoodies with pushed up sleeves. Typical college wardrobe, really.

This is how I still dress in private. I still have my massive t-shirt collection, lol. I don't wear jeans as much as I use to, but they are still a staple in my wardrobe.

When I'm with the ladies, I try be a little bit more put together now. Like maybe I will wear a real blouse and a cardigan or something. Since I'm 23 now and everything... lol. I also usually wont wear tight or revealing clothes around other women.

How To Hijab

Salam sisters,

Bismillah

I was thinking of doing a series of posts about how I went from tshirts and jeans to abaya.

I know most people can't switch cold turkey, and I certainly didn't either, so inshaAllah a how to will be helpful.

Plus it's fall (for us in the Northern Hemisphere) which is the PERFECT time to start covering.

let me know what you think inshaAllah!

much love.

My Hijab Says, by Me

My Hiab Says:

Dear Allah,

I heard you.

I believe you.

I trust you.

Out of love and wisdom you gave me free will and out of love and awe I give it back to you.

Dear Future Husband,

I kept myself for you: you can trust me with your heart and your home and your family.

I know where my priorities are, and you were one of them before I even met you.

Dear Sisters in Humanity,

I respect you as a fellow creation of our Mighty God. I respect your feelings and the stability of your home.

I will not be the cause of your unhappiness, I will not be the downfall of the men you love, I will not betray you.

Dear Brothers in Humanity,

Peace and the Guidance of Allah be on you but, BACK OFF!!!

Dear Self,

We came a long way, but alhamdulillah the steps were worth it. We have respect for ourselves and for others. We think about the consequences of our actions. We are conscious of ourselves and our place in the larger universe.

Alhamdulillah

Allah forgive us all for our shortcomings, give us guidance and protect us from the fire ameeen.

Las Tapadas Limenas

Salam!

Bismillah

I saw an article about tapadas limenas and I was so excited! Tapadas Limenas (there should be a tilde over the n but I don't know how to do that on my keyboard) literally translates to "Covered Women from Lima." Lima is in Peru :-)

Photo Credit

Look, one eye! They follow the sunnah!

So these ladies in Peru covered everything but one eye using a shawl. Why did they do this? For freedom and protection :-D

From the article:

http://www.dailystar.com.lb/article.asp?edition_id=10&categ_id=2&article_id=117479#axzz0vZsmfpuZ

The attire [of clothing] “was clearly intended to serve as a cover, to protect women’s virtue and ward off temptation,” explained Alicia del Aguila, a sociologist who has studied and written about the subject.

Over time, the bourgeoisie and the middle class appropriated the saya and the manto, which became a way for women to hide from unwanted male attention, cover their faces and also conceal their social rank and skin color.

The modest clothes provided “more freedom to those who wore them than ordinary women,” argued del Aguila.

Such an approach is a far cry from the controversy stirred by the veil throughout Europe, where it is seen as a sign of the perceived Muslim oppression of women.

The lower house of Parliament in France, where rundown city suburbs are home to Europe’s biggest Muslim minority, has voted overwhelming to ban full Islamic veils in public spaces, and similar laws are pending in Belgium, Spain and some Italian municipalities.

But in Lima, the tapada loosened the stranglehold on women, giving women a level of greater freedom while protecting their honor.

...

There is no place on Earth were women have more freedom than in Lima,” Franco-Peruvian socialist and feminist Flora Tristan said in 1837 as she enthused about the women who, while covered, were free to stroll in the streets, at amphitheaters and even in Congress.

Summer Wear

Salam!

Bismillah

It is getting hot outside on the top half of the earth and one of our sisters (Elizabeth) asked what are good/comfy things to wear for summer.

So here are my physiological reasons for wearing abaya (beyond religious ones, which are of course the most important :-P)

I am mostly talking about abayaat that are loose, not fitted close to the body and that have sleeves that are open at the bottom (not closed at the wrist). Also watch the fabric because some abayaat are definitely made for cooler weather.

A-line is a good shape for hot weather because it lets the air flow

• The open bottom and sleeves will create a breeze when you walk that allows your sweat to actually do its job to cool you down, even when there isn't a breeze outside. Mini skirts and blue jeans will not do this for you.
• When you wear tight clothes, your sweat does not do anything to cool you off, you just get wet and sticky.
• The loose abaya actually makes it to where your body is walking around in the shade.
• There is a reason why shade is cooler than out in the direct sun. The ambient temperature of the air does affect your body, but your body is strongly affected by the ultra violet (UV) and infrared light that hits your skin. The energy of these photons causes the cells in your body to heat up (that is why UV rays cause burns and cancer) by exciting them to higher energy levels which increases your body temperature as well as the temperature of your skin. The more skin you cover, the more you protect your cells from this energy.
• As a bonus, you wont get as dehydrated, lol. Because the abaya is helping you to use your sweat productively, you will sweat less meaning you will loose less water during the day (a bonus for those of us who are fasting during the summer months!).

Now some reasons for why covering in general is not necessarily more hot than being naked in the sun

• The above reasons are good for this as well (using your sweat productively, portable shade, etc.)
• Also, your body slowly adjusts to what you are wearing outside. If you are usually naked outside and you all of the sudden throw on more clothes, your body will struggle to regulate its temperature with these new conditions (this is why women you do not usually cover will feel hot if they temporarily wear abaya). It is age old wisdom (from my great grandma lol) that if you wear your coat when it is hot outside, you will get cold easier. My mother use to tell me NOT to wear my jacket until it got really cold outside so that my body wouldn't adjust. That way I wouldn't be too cold when I was INSIDE the house.
• Same rules apply here as in the jacket case. Your body will adjust to where you are no more hot or cold than anyone else. I use to never get cold. We kept our house at 63F all year round and I wore t-shirts and shorts all of the time, but now 63F is wickedly cold for me since my body is trained. Now I have to wear sweat pants and sweaters with my tshirt and shorts. (also amazingly I sweat less than I did before, lol)
• There is no such thing as "hot blooded" and "cold blooded" people. It is all about what you condition your body to do :-)
• Another added benefit is that you will spend less money on electricity, lol. You wont need to keep your house as cold during the summer months because your body is ready for it.

Tips for those of you who are thinking about starting to cover:

• If you are able, try starting when the weather is cooler and then just continue to wear the longer clothes as the weather starts to change. This will give your body time to adjust slowly. (I know that advice is a little late in coming, but inshaAllah it will be helpful for someone! :-D)

Niqab Ban: A Rant

Salam sisters,

I think that this is my first rant. It may not make sense and I may take it down later, but I need to get some of these feelings out.

I apologize ahead of time if I hurt anyones feelings. If I do so please let me know because that is not my intention.

Rated PG-13 for liberal use of the word "crap" lol

START RANT:

I am starting to get really PO'd with all of this niqab banning crap. If you want to cite security reasons, okay whatever, but in France security isn't their issue. (And for the record, I firmly believe that the "security" issues are ultimately red herrings thrown out there to divert the population away from the actual issues at hand: the stripping of a population of their rights due to their religion.) The issue in France is that niqab just isn't "secular enough" for the right wing good ol' boys. So their response? Take away people's rights to make little men in suits feel better about their "secularity."

Why would you want a woman walking around who reminds you of the fact that God and doing good things for people along with yourself isn't a priority in your life, right? We wouldn't want you to feel guilty or uncomfortable with your life choices...

And seriously they are going to fine a dude thousands of euro for "forcing" a woman to wear niqab. #1) how often does that really happen in France??? #2) How are you going to enforce that??? "oh your wife wears niqab so you obviously must force her. Here is your fine and one year jail time." Ridiculous.

Who is going to patrol the French Alps to make sure that every teenager in a ski mask is fined and ever father who puts a ski mask on his child goes to prison for a year with a heavy fine?

Who is going to patrol the countryside churches to arrest that bride in her veil and her father who lovingly covered her face with it before she walked down the isle?

Who is going to fine the doctors in their hygienic masks or the send the hospital administration to jail for requiring its use?

Who is going to fine the fumigators and painters for covering their faces?

If Joe Schmo can wear his lovely swastika on his sweater sleeve because it makes him feel powerful then I should darn well be able to cover my face for the Creator of the Worlds!!!!!!

All of this crap is directly related to the minaret banning crap. What is your reason for banning minarets??? Is that security too? Or secularity? Or just plain Islamophobia???????

And REALLY does Quebec have to do EVERYTHING that France does? I'm frankly appalled that this xenophobic crap has spilled over onto the same continent that I live on. I makes me physically ill.

On top of that they are denying people the right of public healthcare. They are denying CITIZENS the right of healthcare on the basis of RELIGION and freedom of EXPRESSION!!! And no one realizes how dangerous this is for human rights everywhere? Are we the only ones who seeeeeeee this madness?

I'm just really pissed and I have no idea what to do to fix the situation. Who do I write to? Who do I call? What do I need to say? Where do I need to say it? HOW do I help make this madness STOP?

And my favorite quote by Benjamin Franklin:

"They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety."

Muslim Countries: Continued

Salam!

Bismillah

The other day I wrote a post called "Muslim Countries" and I received this response in the comments and thought it would be good to address it and have a discussion.

Please keep in mind that Islam encourages us to always argue in the best way (with RESPECT) so if I see anything other than that I will go ahead and delete the comment. I didn't bring this up for a firing squad and I would really like each of you to put yourself in the situation of someone who knows nothing about (or little/ media interpretation of) Islam. :-D

Pásik Kroch: look, if Egyptian, Moroccans etc do not want European/NA tourists to come to their countries, just tell it plainly and frankly.

there is plenty nice places in South Europe/Caribic where we can spend our money.

and as for this niqab problem - main problem is the religous exception to obstacle to identification and state security.
not only in UK, but in many moslem countries were countless robberies in bank/jeweleries committed by burka/niquabed men.

so niquabi is putting over her supposed piety above the potential safety and lives of other people.

It seems childish to me.
but if someone is so self-centered.. there is no help against it.

My Response:

I think on this issue it is really all about which side you are looking from.

as for the egypt/morocco thing, I had no idea that they ask tourists to cover in those countries as tourism is a major market there. I actually don't think they ask people to do that there (but maybe one of the sisters from there can answer that question for us). I was speaking more along the lines of Saudi, which is not a tourist centered economy, where they do ask women to cover (in abaya). People tend to get upset at this, yet they want to impose similar (but anithetical) laws on other women.

As for state security and identification, it is not such a problem to have a woman officer or security guard on duty to identify women. In actuality, women who veil are creating jobs for UK/EU/NA women :-D

As for robberies, people will continue to cover their faces when they rob places regardless of whether innocent women are also covering their faces. If you have a high risk situation (like a jewelry store or a bank) have a female guard id covered women on their way in. They would generally have to be id'd before purchase or withdrawl/deposit anyway, so just move the process to to the door.

A religious person will put obeying their Creator/God/Master/Lord before everything. This is what it means to submit to God. You do the things you know are right whether or not people agree with you or make it easy for you.

I don't think that these women are self-centered. I think they are God centered. And I thank God for women like this because their modesty and piety is a breath of fresh air when surrounded by butt cheeks and boob jobs on every corner.

It is difficult to put yourself in someone elses shoes. I know because I do try to find a way to see the issue from the other perspective. I know that, in western culture, a covered face means shifty motives, but in actuality the world doesn't always work that way. And however many security issues people have brought up, I always see a potential solution without having to deny anyone their right to freedom of religion and pursuit of happiness.

Pasik: Please feel free to comment again, as I would love to continue the discussion :-) And thanks again!

Ladies: If you can think of any other specific issues that people have brought up about veiling and laws or rights of women, please feel free to post them to the comments so that we can all address them inshaAllah once and for all.

When we are all through I am convert this post (or compile a new one) to showcase all of our problems and solutions inshaAllah.

Muslim Countries

Salam!

Bismillah

I don't understand this logic...

When we want to cover in "Western" countries, we are told to "go to a Muslim country if you want to do that."

Yet when "Westerners" go to Muslim countries, they are highly insulted when someone asks them to cover up properly.

Can anyone explain this to me?

DIY

Salam!

Bismillah

I have been looking for an abaya since mine are getting a bit a lot worn, and I looked around a bunch of websites that you all suggested (thanks so much!!! :-D)

I must just be too picky or something. I couldn't find anything I actually liked... especially not something that I would consider decently priced.

I don't always have enough money to eat something besides ramen (alhamdulillah I really love ramen), so how am I supposed to shell out $40-50 per abaya when I need at least two or three news ones?

My solution:

DIY

Oh yeah, inshaAllah when classes are over I'm going to set about trying to make an abaya/jilbab for myself :-D

I plan to document my progress so inshaAllah I will let you all know how it goes.

Wish me luck!

Safety Pin

As-salamu alaikum

Bismillah

I'm pretty sure everyone has ruined a favorite scarf with a regular safety pin right?

What to do?!?

I live in a pretty small town so we don't get those fancy "no snag hijab pins" down here, so I decided to get industrious!

This is what I do to save my hijabs from the safety pin monster.

I use a piece of thick fabric to act as a buffer between the safety pin and the cloth of my scarf :-D

What do you guys do to avoid snags?